7 Things You Should Never Do During Intimacy, According to Science

We all want to have a great time in the bedroom. We want connection, pleasure, and fun. But sometimes, without knowing it, we do things that ruin the moment or even hurt our health.

It isn’t just about “manners.” Doctors and psychologists have actually studied this! There are specific actions that can cause infections, kill the chemical bond between partners, or ruin your physical satisfaction.

Knowing the things you should never do during intimacy isn’t about following strict rules; it is about keeping yourself safe and your relationship strong.

7 Things You Should Never Do During Intimacy

Your body and brain are very sensitive during close moments. Biologically, you are releasing hormones like oxytocin (the love drug) and dopamine. Psychologically, you are in a vulnerable state.

The things you should never do during intimacy are usually “disruptors.” They either introduce bad bacteria where they shouldn’t be, or they spike your stress hormones (cortisol), which instantly shuts down pleasure. By avoiding these mistakes, you work with your body, not against it.

Here are 7 things you should never do during intimacy, according to science:

1. Faking It (The Psychology Trap)

Science says this is a bad idea. When you fake enjoyment or a climax, you are using “operant conditioning” on your partner.

You are essentially training them to do the wrong thing. You are rewarding them for a move that didn’t actually work. Over time, this leads to a disconnect because they think they are pleasing you, but they aren’t.

2. Skipping the “Warm Up” (Foreplay)

Biologically, a woman’s body needs about 20 minutes of arousal to fully prepare for intimacy (creating lubrication and “tenting” to make space).

Science shows that skipping this can cause micro-tears and pain. Rushing isn’t just rude; itโ€™s physically harmful to delicate tissues.

3. Ignoring Pain

Pain is your body’s alarm system. Science tells us that if you push through pain, your brain starts to associate intimacy with danger.

This can lead to conditions like vaginismus (where muscles clamp shut involuntarily). Never just “grin and bear it.” Stop immediately to protect your neural pathways.

4. Checking Your Phone

This kills the “oxytocin loop.” When you look at a screen, your brain switches from deep connection to shallow distraction.

It creates a “rejection” signal in your partner’s brain. Science confirms that “phubbing” (phone snubbing) during intimate moments is a top predictor of relationship dissatisfaction.

5. Switching from “Back” to “Front” (Without Cleaning)

This is a major hygiene rule. Bacteria from the back door (E. coli) can cause terrible infections if moved to the front door.

Doctors warn that this is the number one cause of honeymoon cystitis and UTIs. Always change protection or wash up before switching zones.

6. Holding Your Breath

Many people hold their breath when things get intense. But your muscles need oxygen to prevent cramping and to reach a climax.

Science shows that deep, rhythmic breathing calms your nervous system and actually makes physical sensations stronger.

7. Skipping the Bathroom After

You might want to just fall asleep, but science says you must pee after intimacy. This flushes out any bacteria that might have entered the urethra.

It is nature’s way of preventing painful urinary tract infections. (Note: You don’t necessarily need to go before, but always go after.

things you should never do during intimacy

Conclusion

Great intimacy is smart intimacy. The things you should never do during intimacy are simple to avoid once you know them.

By listening to science, protecting your body from bacteria and your mind from bad habits, you ensure that your bedroom remains a place of joy and health. Treat your body with respect, and it will reward you with pleasure.

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FAQs

1. Is faking it really that bad?

Yes. Psychologically, it creates a wall between you. It also guarantees that your partner will never learn what you actually like, dooming you to mediocre intimacy forever.

2. Why do I need to pee after?

During intimacy, bacteria can get pushed up into the urinary tract. Peeing acts like a “power wash” to clear it out before an infection starts.

3. Can skipping foreplay actually hurt?

Yes. Without natural lubrication and expansion, friction can cause small tears in the skin, which increases the risk of infection and pain.

4. What if my partner wants to switch positions quickly?

Communication is key. Just say, “Wait a second,” and swap protection or grab a wipe. It only takes ten seconds to prevent a week of sickness.

5. What is the most important thing to avoid?

Ignoring Pain (#3). Protecting your body from trauma is the most important thing. Intimacy should never hurt. If it does, stop and investigate why.